Friend Zone

Friend Zone

"You, you got what I need, but you say he's just a friend and you say he's just a friend." - Lyrics of Biz Markie's ‘Just a Friend.'

It seems too often that we find ourselves catching feelings for our best guy or girl friend. MTV even made a television show about it, titled "Friend Zone". But should we really risk our friendships for potential relationships? And if the answer is yes, how do we leave the ‘friend zone' and moves towards relationship status?

I have this friend, and for the sake of privacy, we'll call him "Mark." One day Mark approaches me and he says he thinks we should try being more than friends. Well I wasn't having the best of luck with men, and even though Mark wasn't really my type, I told him I would give it some thought. Before I could even really think about it, he comes back to me and says never mind he would rather be friends. Several months later, Mark gets a job and moves to Montana. He calls one day out the blue and says he wants to try again at being more than friends. Then he reneges once again a couple days later.

I'm not really sure what his thought process was, but I was a little frustrated by the back and forth, especially because I was really starting to consider an actually relationship with him. But this doesn't have to be your situation. I asked some of my class mates and co-workers their opinions on the subject, and [If you're finding yourself attracted to your guy or girl friend on a romantic level,] here is what they had to say on getting out of the ‘friend zone.'

Just Tell Them

The common consensus was to just let your friend know. Sit them down and tell them how you feel about them. Ask them are they interested in having a potential relationship, and then discuss how you could make a relationship work.

Spice Up Your Activities

If you do not want to just flat out tell them, plan more romantic outings together. For instance, go see a romantic comedy together or a romantic meal. Eventually they will notice that the activities are more couple oriented, and then you can make your big move.

It's The Small Things That Count

Do things that would be out the norm to your friend. Like for guys, maybe try opening a door or pulling out a chair. Ladies, watch and/or play a sport with him that he really enjoys. Your friend will ask what caused the change, and it allows them to see you in a new light.

But whatever way you decide to let your friend know you want more than a friendship, just remember, if you choose to say something you could possibly lose your friend and remain single.

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Graphic courtesy of MCT Wire Service